Thursday, November 17, 2011

Flexing her muscle pt. 2

Picking up where I left off with yesterday's post, Miss H txted me the following -

"We've gotten far, far away from the rules established in The Principles. I'm pissed about it. So, for the next two days you must ask for permission to use the bathroom. And, I want you to pick one gay or transvestite story you like, send me the link, and tell me why you like it. You have until noon today."

The story part wasn't hard, I have tons of stories both saved and bookmarked on my computer because I love, repeat, love, when Miss H talks dirty to me or reads me stories. I quickly picked out a short one because I knew she was at work and emailed her the link and why I liked it. If you're interested, the story can be found here. The next part of her assignment was bathroom control. To be honest, at first I didn't know how much of a punishment this was because anything that involves Miss H taking further control over me turns me on immensely.

The first day things went off without a hitch. Every time I needed to use the bathroom I would have to txt her and she would soon reply back with a yes. At one point she made me wait ten minutes before using the bathroom but that wasn't a big deal. The only issues I had were of my own doing, I would wait until almost the last minute before remembering I needed to have her permission so even though she was quick to reply, it got tough because I had waited to long to ask. At one point it occurred me that what was I going to do if she didn't reply in time. What if she had a meeting or just didn't check her phone? I txted once more with that now very concerning problem weighing heavily on my mind.

Her reply was simple and to the point -

"Well, you'll either have to disobey a direct order from me or you'll just piss your pants."

With thoughts of her previous punishments floating around in my head, I knew that doing anything without her permission was not really an option I wanted to explore again. The latter option wasn't to appealing either. I love being humiliated by Miss H but that's usually in the confines of the privacy of our home or at least doing so somewhat anonymously in public. Peeing myself in front of co-workers was a bit of a different story. Initially I thought that was just Miss H talking tough. She might be a ball buster sometimes, but she's sane enough to realize that our kink life may cause some significant "real life" issues if done without thinking. For example pissing myself in the middle of a meeting.

Then again, with Miss H you never know. I often times, incorrectly, think Miss H is scared to push things to far. That she just does certain things for my benefit. It's those times, when I let my guard down that she seems to slam me with something so far beyond what I expect. She wouldn't order me to stand in front of my coworkers and piss, but not replying to my txt and having me suffer, and wait, and eventually figure out some way to follow her order yet not lose my job in the process is exactly the kind of thing I can see her doing. The mind fuck is her specialty.

I was thinking about that the next morning while I was showering and getting ready for work. I thought about possibly wearing a diaper to work hidden under my clothes. That way I could still follow her orders of getting her permission, but in case she chose not to reply I was safe because when I couldn't hold it anymore I would at least be protected from any embarrassment. I ended up not going with the diaper because Miss H would probably have looked at that as cheating and then just given me a more difficult assignment as punishment. Plus, I wanted to be discrete so if I didn't wear the usual diaper routine (multiple diapers with plastic panties) in order to not draw attention to myself, the lower level of protection might leak and cause embarrassment anyway.

My solution?

I brought an extra pair of pants, another pair of panties, and a large bath towel with me in my bag. I figured in the worst case scenario I could either duck out out into the smaller, less frequented bathroom or escape to my car when I got to that point of no return if Miss H didn't reply. There I would wait until I lost control and peed, thus not disobeying her and yet at the same preventing what would be a humiliating experience in the most unsatisfying way. I could then change, return to work, and carry on like nothing had happened. No one would be the wiser that a grown ass man in panties and a cock cage just pissed himself because his Mistress didn't give him permission to use a bathroom like a normal male.

This is what my life has now become.

And I couldn't be happier.

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